Connection Poem

I’m not much of a poet, and when I do write, it’s usually just free verse, since rhyme is an evasive partner I’ve never quite been able to catch. However, my Intro to Literature class is currently doing a poetry unit, and each person has to choose a poem and write a short essay in response to it.

I decided to try something else- a connection poem, instead of an essay. I’d appreciate any feedback you all have.

 

The original poem, by Langston Hughes, written in 1959:

 

Dream Deferred

What happens to a dream deferred?

         Does it dry up

         like a raisin in the sun?

         Or fester like a sore–

          and then run?

          Does it stink like rotten meat?

           Or crust and sugar over–

          like a syrupy sweet?

           Maybe it just sags

           like a heavy load.

            Or does it explode?

 

And my very rough sketch of a connection poem.

 

Explosion

When dreams long since are spent

and broken-

when a weary people can no longer

wait-

they will rise up, rise

from raisins and sores and rotten meat,

and they will speak.

They will speak, and speak, and speak

of heavy loads and great burdens.

Men and women,

young and old,

in the streets of Birmingham,

in street cars,

in churches, schools, restaurants,

they will rise up, rise

from raisins and sores and rotten meat.

And they will speak.

They will speak and speak and speak

on the very steps of freedom

and listen while their King proclaims his dream.

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